Disjointed

I had a dislocated finger yesterday. The middle knuckle of the ring-finger on my right hand was disjointed by about 45 degrees. I'll post the x-ray later.

I'm typing one-handed now.

How did this happen? You may ask.

As to the exact cause I can only speculate, since I wasn't conscious the moment it happened.
Generally speaking, though, I can say with great confidence that at the moment of dislocation a considerable proportion of my 225 pounds was poised above the finger and the tile floor was situated directly below it.

Just before that moment, my body must have been in a free fall from a standing position, with the trajectory of the fall being guided only by the interplay between the laws of physics and the mass and structure of my body.

By chance, my fall avoided numerous obstacles in the bathroom, and my head was completely spared. Indeed, only my right arm received noticeable damage: scrapes on the elbow and "trauma" (minor, with one exception) to three of the fingers.

The series of unfortunate events that lead to all of the above I'll briefly explain.
9:00 am major back spasm erupts while clearing my throat on the kitchen porch. The shock of pain nearly drops me to my knees.
9:05 ingest a muscle relaxant in hopes of a quick cure.
10:00 fall asleep under influence of the drug
11:30 wake with full bladder
11:32 finish urinating
11:32 pass out
12:30 Heidi drives me to urgent care clinic
2:30 doctor "reduces" the dislocated finger after checking for fractures and bone fragments
3:30 drive home with Green Curry, Tom Ka Gai and sweet rice with mango and coconut sauce.